a hinted help

four years isn't it?
four years..
it is quite a long time
I had been trying to mend the broken
one time I failed
but the other times
you came to rebuild the pieces, unintentionally
I said you didn't intend to make me whole again, but you did

you did it like a clump of gray clouds longing to pour the cats and dogs
into a dreadfully drying drought on a ground full of hopes
you brought the hopes back to life

however, unlike water that constantly gives us hope to live
the drought was brought back by your presence and absence
you brought water to me by your presence
you brought life to me by your presence
little do you know, that misery and agony came along to me by your absence
and during your presence either

somehow I felt sad with your presence
knowing that I might not have you by my side in the future
knowing that you saw her everytime you were with me
knowing that you only saw me as a former partner in everything

now I know that you did it on purpose
not by accident, not because you didn't want to
but because you wanted to help me
to help me realized that you broke me
to help me eased the pain you gave
to help me erased the scars you made
to help me understood that some things are not meant to be, like us